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Rooster tripawed
31 Jan 2012

Coming around the bend of the 2nd round of chemo ,or if heaven aint a lot like dixie……….

Author: rooster | Filed under: Uncategorized

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If heaven aint a lot like Dixie i don’t wanna go if heaven aint a lot like  Dixie I’d just as soon stay home ……………
If heaven don’t have any dogs then i guess i wont have to worry about it, I can’t for the life of me nor you think of what a boring place it would be without dogs ,even if they have to let in them mangy Feline whiners to boot ,it just wouldn’t seem like heaven without mans best friend…….and thinking of mans best friend ,heaven and mangy felines just gets me reminiscing about the last few days and how Ive been to dog Heaven a few times and i aint even had to die…..Friday was a slow day beings i was so worn out from the trip to the coast for this last intergalactic style of Mugwump jisum secretion harvesting turned ass backwards and what with the weird chemical taste in  my mouth and the weirder dreams and feelings asleep and awake to the point of waking in the middle of the night long before the 6AM train was to arrive and being scared out of my wits (what wits a dog has which are many more then them humans give us credit for) and crawling up on my pets bed, and though feeling quite safe from the noises the 6AM train makes was still quite scared of what i didn’t know was or wasn’t out there or in me or tweaking me for that matter and so i climbed future onto the bed as far as a three legged canine can crawl when the unknown is creeping up on him and ready to pounce ,and ended up with my head right near my pets ,and he rubbed me all over and made the whole dangerous time seem a bit more okay,and then he crawled outta bed and fed me a few of them white wafers i like and in no time i was off to sleep and dreaming the slow dog day dreams that life should be made of. And so came the morning and that noisy train had gave us a break beings it don’t run on the weekends and had allowed us a few more hours of sleep then we anticipated . So Saturday rolls around and the whole baby sitting the dog action kinda ceased and i was allowed to go out with my tracking collar on and sniff around the farm and roll in the grass that the recent rains have produced and have quite a grand and joyous time ,for a dog…….Then low and behold my pets siblings showed up and i was so happy to see Big John that i jumped right up three legs and all and put my left paw on his shoulder (which isn’t easy beings he is inches abovet six foot) and proceeded to try and plant some wet slobbers on his mug so to speak, and was quite happy all in all that he came to visit though it was short. But like they say all  good things come to an end and that’s the same with the ,wait that’s another song and another story ,so to make it all more simple , the pet chased me into the house which i didn’t make easy for him ( not being an easy thing chasing a three legged dog through gravel in a wheelchair ) and finally was rounded up and forced into the house and left ,while they all headed over to that place that feeds me food on a plate .So I just lay and waited knowing they would return in no time at all and which they did and proceeded to be hooked up to the tracking collar again and let out to cruise the grounds and protect the farm. Well after being brought in and fed and medicated i headed off to dream land and better dreams were at hand and the sleep came easier not having such weird side effects from the poison they have been filling my body with every three weeks and woke to what could be termed as a day in dog heaven ,which is where this all started i believe . First i was suited up with my custom pulling harness which doubles as a seat belt type harness for when i ride the green machine( see its a Ural) and knew adventure was at paw so to speak and was then lead out of the fence line and on down the road and upon rounding the corner heard my sweetheart that little redheade bitch Bonnie (just don’t tell Dixie Roo) and was again allowed to frolic about with her for an hour or so while the pet conversed with the other humans about and really had a good time ,I did venture into the little door in the big door here but made sure to stay out of the dead animal head room and low and behold found a full bowl of dog food and though it consisted mainly of corn and is no where as good as the stuff my pet feeds me proceeded to fill myself up ( see with dogs its the same as with most humans and most times we think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence and that applies to dog food also) until i was ran out by the female pet human of this neighborly clan and continued to frolic. But as we said above all good things must come to and end ,but that doesn’t mean that end is the cease of all fun and good times because we then headed not towards home but towards the place that feeds me human food on a human plate and upon walking through the door seemed for a bit to be the center of attraction ,I had a cute little girl petting on me once she was convinced that I being a lover of kids and a protector of any little human pups would never in my wildest dreams harm so much as a hair on her little head ,and even got to sniff what appeared to be the smallest baby human pet i have ever seen all cradled up in some kinda portable cage type baby pet carrier and oh that baby smelled so different from all the rest of the pets and brought a curious smile to my mug.  Then i was prodded ( which doesn’t take much beings I’m a trained service dog ) into sitting quietly and politely next to my pets chair and slightly under the table as to be out of the way of the other humans feet and was then presented with a large bowl of MEAT, yeah cooked Meat ,as yes this is the dogs life ,though i finished the bowl in three shakes of a pugs tail which curly as they are don’t shake much , and was then slipped treats of beacon and sausage and french toast until i was quite sated and fell into a deep sleep. When i awoke it was time to bid farewells and say goodbye and was planted with loving pets from the whole crowd that had assembled for whatever occasion they do other then to feed their faces, and reluctantly headed on home . Once home i was filled with the assorted pills from the many blue bottles on the counter and was then surprised with a very large and very delicious home baked oatmeal cookie to have and hold all to myself until it disappeared. So the night went better this last and the dreams were pleasant with no sick feelings and very few adverse effects from this second of many rounds of Chemo and thought if they all go this easy then i think i just may get through this whole unpleasant regime and one day settle back into the life i once knew and loved . All in all with the help and love of my pet and his human friends this whole sad and shocking nightmare has , is and i think always will be still an awesome addition to this adventure I call life . So remember , keep chewing on that shoe.


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